Tuesday, January 3, 2012

Starting the New Year!

I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday season!

New Year's Eve quietly passed by with pizza and conversation.  We drove to our friend's house, yakked for a few hours then headed home.  I didn't have to see any ball drop to know that it was the start of a new year, ya know?

I'm not one for resolutions, but there are a couple that I'd like to pass on to you: 

Make this the year that you rid yourself of friends that aren't really friends and relationships that just suck the life out of you.  We've all had them.  You might hate to hurt someone's feelings, or hate the initial confrontation.  Do it anyway.  You'll be much happier later.

I had two 'friendships' that I had to end.  One was with a gal that had the 'it's all about me' syndrome.  You know the type.  The conversation always had to revolve around what she was doing, what she got, what she wanted.  Agh.  After a number of years, I decided that it really wasn't worth it.  Yes, years. 

The other 'friend' took advantage of me for an awfully long time, too. I'm a slow learner some times.  But I knew long before I gradually ended the relationship that I felt just lousy after being around her.  What really corked it was listening to her talk to people on the phone, being all syrupy sweet, then hearing a blast of nastiness about them after she hung up the phone.  Made me wonder what she said about me when I wasn't around.

So, tell yourself that you deserve to have a better friends and they deserve to be around people that truly appreciate them, so it's not all bad.

And the other thing:  Find your passion and go for it!  Make this the year that you rid yourself of the job that you absolutely hate.  Do something different that gives you enough money to get by on and follow your bliss.  Consider changing your lifestyle or location to make that happen. Easy to talk about but much harder to do.  If you can't chuck your job, then do some things that you truly love when you're not working.  Say 'no' to things that take up your free time and say 'yes' to doing things you want to do.  Need to learn a new skill for a different job?  Then start researching now on how to do that.  Need to go to college to learn that skill?  Start looking now for 'free' money to help pay for tuition, books, materials.  Make an appointment with an advisor and see how and where to start.  Then take that first step.  Don't stop there, take the second step.

Sometimes it's finding the resolve to keep taking steps that's hard.  I had one friend years ago that wanted a bathroom painted in that dark purple that you'd see on a pansy.  Fear of failure (?), fear of critisim, fear of XYZ, whatever, kept her from ever having it.  She got as far as buying two gallons of paint.  Once a year, she'd take the paint back to the store to have the gallons shaken up again, then back on the shelf in her house.  The last time I talked to her, she still wasn't brave enough to open a can and roll some on the walls.  Several people offered to help, but she just hadn't found the courage to be different yet.

I always wanted to learn how to make soap. I finally decided that this time I was going to do it.  Now I'm not sure what I'm going to do with 20 bars of plain soap.  Especially since I want to try some different recipes.

Bill hasn't filed for divorce because of it.  My friends that don't do the homemade 'anything' think I'm nuts, but they still like me.  Or they tolerate me well.  These are good relationships, huh.